runnerG87
B/P Cycle from Hell due to Week from Hell
by
, 05-11-2010 at 08:01 PM (701 Views)So lately things have sucked! I don't want to go into details about the stress in my life because right now I am in the middle of a binge and I am fantasizing about my purge. I know it is weird but I look forward to a binge because of the purge. I will even chug so much water to feel full and purge that right up. I like it and the power and control and the shaking! I want more! My roommates need to leave so I can finally purge for awhile! I am fasting starting tomorrow so I am sure my water purging will happen a lot more frequently as I won't be eating all these freaking strawberries!
I hate myself so much! I really feel like crap and I just want to purge but no one will freaking leave the house! I cannot WAIT till Saturday when I am in my new place! My own place! My place. I can do whatever I want! I am so glad my therapist doesn't try to stop me, I am also really glad I can tell him these things and we talk about it but he doesn't try to tell me to change.
I think I just heard them leave! The bathroom and I have a date because I screwed up on my exam today. Tomorrow is another day and my last exam. How long will I be in the bathroom after tomorrow's exam?