Hello

[FatGirl]

Well.... I am 19years old and my screen name pretty much explains how I feel about myself. I'm 5'8" and weigh about 228lbs but I guess I don't really look it. most people guess I am 180 and I am tired of being fat. I don't eat really bad food and I also am not super healthy. I am trying to lose weight, I have 3 P.E. classes at "my" college this semister. I just kind of blew up because I was wearing a button-up shirt that was already big on me and mom said it looked like my gut was hanging out and that the button was going to pop off. I wear size 18pants and I am sick of it *crys* I feel like nothing I do is going to help me. The longest I have ever gone without eating is about 3 days (i know who hoo big deal) Everytime I think about becoming ana. I get worried because I hear your body with store fat before it starts to lose it. I'm am just so tird of living in a world where you have to be a size 00 for guys to care about you. I have a fiance that loves me for me and doesn't expect me to lose any weight (he's about 280lbs), he is trying to lose weight for his knee surgery. I am just frustrated and stressed out, I am terrified he is going to leave me for someone skinnyer than me and it makes me want to just never eat anything again.... I hate this so much... Oh and I guess for fun i'll post a picture of myself.

P.S. I have a passion for showing horses and it's my one escape (for the most part) people will often comment about how I need larger horses to carry my weight which hurts. It's hard to me to handle such comments when I already hate everyone about myself. I love My horse though.

[FatAss]

Hiya, I know how you feel about bein frustrated that's how I used to feel. Maybe instead of condidering ana you could just eat 3 healthy meals a day and do a bit of exercise everyday and see if that changes you. Hope this helps. X

[FatGirl]

I eat fairly healthy. I am not sure what my "problem" is. I think it could be that I eat pretty quickly. My mom is always telling me to slow down, so maybe I eat too much that way?

[piglet]

i think you need to be aware that anorexia isnt a choice you make.. its something outside of your control. there is also a dieters section on this site, if you feel that is for you.

i do know how you feel when you talk about how you see yourself.. there is a lot of support on this site which will hopefully help you.

personally, i think the biggest thing for a lot of people can be portion control... dont just go straight for a three day fast because it is not good for you..
religiously measure out your food and consume maybe 1000-1200 cals a day and keep riding- thats great exercise... you should lose a couple of pounds a week.

i hope this message doesnt come across as patronising, i just know from experience that anorexia often makes peoples lives harder as opposed to easier, and dont want you to feel like you have to live like that to change yourself.

but like i said, there is support here if you need it.