Oh godohgodohgodohgod

i just told a teacher



i mean, he's a teacher that believes in me and wants to see me get into grad school and thinks i have talent and potential and i just shot all of that to hell

what was i thinking?

i'm fucking retarded

oh my god

i wish i could take it back
i mean, he got super concerned lately and our meetings are more, 'what's going on with you?' because i've been starving myself to the point i can't fucking focus to write and i've had shit all to show him lately but