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Thread: Loneliness

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  1. 08-10-2014 #1
    Meredead
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    Default Loneliness

    Does anyone else feel this constant aching loneliness?
    It's like I can't reach out anymore- it feels impossible. I think about it all the time but saying, doing- feels more than I can do.
    I feel like so few people understand. Does anyone else feel it?

  2. 08-10-2014 #2
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    Default Loneliness

    No hun <3 you're not the only one
    "If I have any taste, it s for hardly anything
    but earth and stones.

    Let us eat air, rock, coal, iron.
    Turn, my hungers.
    Feed, hungers, in the meadow of sounds!
    Suck the gaudy poison of the convolvuli;
    Eat, the stones a poor man breaks,
    the old masonry of churches, boulders,
    children of floods, loaves lying in the grey valleys! "

    edirony.tumblr.com


  3. 08-10-2014 #3
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    Default

    I feel like this when I stop taking my antidepressants. That's why I pop dem' pills and adopted two dogs.

  4. 08-11-2014 #4
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    Default

    I feel it all the time. This nagging feeling of isolation. Eating disorders can be so isolating at times. I find the only people who truly understand this feeling are those who have eating disorders or addictions. Because this kind of loneliness is even different than the kind I experienced when I was battling depression without the ED.
    "I can't go back to yesterday, because I was a different person then."
    -Alice

  5. 08-11-2014 #5
    cet201
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    Default

    you are definitely not alone, it's like being trapped, wanting to scream to friends. and nobody can hear. kinda :L for me anyway!
    I hope it eases up on you soon guys x

  6. 08-11-2014 #6
    Meredead
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    Default

    Cet- that sums it up totally. It is like being trapped where noone can hear you. I wish I could ask whether people see I struggle. I wish I could ask for more support but I'm scared that if people knew I'd lose work; that people wouldn't trust me and watch me all the time; most importantly that they'd take away my choices in restricting and that I'd be forced to do more than I can. SomeNights- you're right it is totally an addiction and I don't really know where I need to go at the moment but I know a total loss of control would be the end for me.
    I'm sorry and glad that others feel the same- I hate to think of others suffering like this but it feels better that I'm not alone in this pain.

  7. 08-11-2014 #7
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    Default

    One of (of like the only other then walking partners on the scheduled walks) the only things I miss about IP is the relatability factor, though I have to say that place was the loneliest hell hole that exists! I totally get where you are coming from. It's rather captivating of a feeling, in a most empty unsatisfying way.

    (^irony in last comment, I had to edit to point out. Baha, not intentional.)

  8. 08-11-2014 #8
    cet201
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    Default

    when i struggled most i forced myself to tell close family/friends, i got pretty nasty when they tried telling me what to eat though :L it's such a horrible situation give me a message sometime if you fancy a chat/need to vent. ill be glad to listen

  9. 08-12-2014 #9
    Meredead
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    Thanks Cet. It is horrible and never seems to go. I wish I could reach out but like you said, people expect so much and there's only so much I can do

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