Help, I can't eat

[EvilTerrorKitty]

I just really don't know what to do right now.
I just can't eat. I binged yesterday at night on a normal amount of food, I didn't purge because I was too tired and I just don't have the balls to eat today. I am at home with my mom who knows, I am bulimic. I can just eat when I throw up, but I can't throw up because
a) my mom is at home and
b) I recently had big issues with getting the food up.
So, I can't even eat my low calorie food because then I will eat a lot and.... Yeah. I need the food because otherwise I won't be able to eat until tomorrow evening (due to a lot of appointments) and I will probably pass out. I almost blacked out today, and I don't want to be brought to the hospital and forced to eat.
I am so desperate...

[pearljamx12]

Likewise girl. I know what your feeling!! I literally fast until the trigger runs wild in me and I b/p. today I totally was fine until about 3pm and then I just went crazy. Ugh. Here I am another night, another bottle of vodka and a sore as f**k throat and scarred knuckles. I wish I could give some good advice.... But I suck at that lol so here's a big hug *hugs*

[EvilTerrorKitty]

Likewise girl. I know what your feeling!! I literally fast until the trigger runs wild in me and I b/p. today I totally was fine until about 3pm and then I just went crazy. Ugh. Here I am another night, another bottle of vodka and a sore as f**k throat and scarred knuckles. I wish I could give some good advice.... But I suck at that lol so here's a big hug *hugs*

Thank you! The problem is that we are reactive eating, but we are too deep in this restriction-b/p cycle to get a normal relationship with food again.

[pearljamx12]

Really hope you don't feel faint, do you like coffee? I find black coffee keeps me from feeling dizzy. And yes I totally agree, once you have an eating disorder it's with us for life. Recovery seems so far away when this has been my life for so long. I honestly don't know what "normal" is anymore. Hope you feel better today x

[EvilTerrorKitty]

Really hope you don't feel faint, do you like coffee? I find black coffee keeps me from feeling dizzy. And yes I totally agree, once you have an eating disorder it's with us for life. Recovery seems so far away when this has been my life for so long. I honestly don't know what "normal" is anymore. Hope you feel better today x

I get sick from coffee... I don't know why... Makes me throw up, just like cigarettes.
Thanks a lot

[pearljamx12]

I get sick from coffee... I don't know why... Makes me throw up, just like cigarettes.
Thanks a lot

Yeah I can't do cigarettes either! Thank god. Not like I need to add another addiction to the list!

[Queen_mab]

Really hope you don't feel faint, do you like coffee? I find black coffee keeps me from feeling dizzy. x

Caffeine only makes your heart accelerate and your pressure go up. It doesn't have the slightest nutritional value so it is not really helpful in any sort of way.


To be honest darling, the right thing to do is just put food in your mouth. If you end up binging it still won't be as bad for you as straight out fasting or eating close to nothing. I know it is extremely hard but I also know that if we always listened to our head and did what we feel like doing without ever getting out of our confort zone we would never get out of this disorder, yet it is possible which means you can fight your negative emotions with your will power. I think you can definitively do it, small steps one at a time.

[pearljamx12]

Caffeine only makes your heart accelerate and your pressure go up. It doesn't have the slightest nutritional value so it is not really helpful in any sort of way.


To be honest darling, the right thing to do is just put food in your mouth. If you end up binging it still won't be as bad for you as straight out fasting or eating close to nothing. I know it is extremely hard but I also know that if we always listened to our head and did what we feel like doing without ever getting out of our confort zone we would never get out of this disorder, yet it is possible which means you can fight your negative emotions with your will power. I think you can definitively do it, small steps one at a time.

You are absolutely right there! Caffeine unfortunately is the only thing that helps me stay alert so I need it. But yes, if I could eat, I would x

[bulimiargh]

You are absolutely right there! Caffeine unfortunately is the only thing that helps me stay alert so I need it. But yes, if I could eat, I would x

Careful to regulate your intake throughout the day though—I find too much caffeine makes me sleepy, weirdly enough, and you need to have a constant, moderate intake to ensure you don't crash. Eg. A small coffee in the morning and a small coffee at lunch is better and more efficient than a large coffee in the morning.