Loss of sex drive...

[blondiie019]

Hey ya'll,
So it kind of got me thinking when I saw the sex and relationship threads because I find myself struggling with this. I've been with my fiance for 3 years now, and in the begining of our relationship the sex was great and plentiful. However now I find I'm not even the slightest bit interested in having sex because I'm so consumed with my appearance and how I look and feel. I constantly feel fat and do not want him to see me without my clothes on. Do any of ya'll have this problem as well?? Or have any advice on how to deal with it?

[pinkprincessbelle]

I find for myself that while I'm like this it's better for me to not be with anyone cause I'm consumed with the ed and how I look. Sux but I have no drive whatsoever. Don't have a solution....sorry. Recovery maybe...HA like that's going to happen anytime soon!

[blondiie019]

ha i know what you mean.
i almost want to be alone, its so hard to try and hide this from him. when i don't eat i'm fine, but when i do eat i just purge, and its so hard to hide the purging because i only eat when i'm with him. its the strangest thing. when we're together i want to go to the hated mcdonalds or any kind of fast food. but when i'm alone i know its wrong and i don't eat. any ideas on this one?? haha

[Nelly]

I am the same way when it comes to sex. Right now my husband and I are going through a seperation. But, when we were together I never wanted to have sex with him. I didn't know if it was because of the fact that I hated myself, if it was because I had been abused as a child or because I didn't love him. I still don't really know. But, I do know that it isn't healthy. For a while we went through counciling and I really wanted my sex drive back, but I still don't have it. Have you tried to talk to your Fiance about your concertns, Blondie?

[blondiie019]

i have talked to him about that, however he thinks that its because i'm not attracted to him, which it totally not the case because i love him to death, and i'm extremely atrcted to him, i just don;t ever feel like i have the time for it ya know and i do NOT in anyway shape or form feel comfortable with myself... if only there was an easy solution but of course there isn't..

[Chew]

I am a guy but think its my ED that has really killed my sex drive, I never feel like sex, when I do have it I don't really feel the pleasure I should, In fact I am looking for a sex free relationship probably, But tbh what do we need sex for anyway, if we don't feel like it, then we don't need it, right?

[piglet]

for me its totally the opposite...

my bf is quite a bit taller and broader than me obv.

so for me, comparing myself to him is comforting because he makes me feel petite (when im totally not).

i also kind of feel validated through sex... like if he finds me attractive that cures the ache for a little while.

[Heba86]

for me its totally the opposite...

my bf is quite a bit taller and broader than me obv.

so for me, comparing myself to him is comforting because he makes me feel petite (when im totally not).

i also kind of feel validated through sex... like if he finds me attractive that cures the ache for a little while.

I'm sort of the same way. I prefer taller and broader men for that very same reason. Average build guys make me feel so huge.
As much as I don't believe men when they tell me I'm pretty, I still like to hear it and do feel a sense of validation.

[Sanne]

I think it's normal...
It's the same here... But I kind of have the feeling like I am a whale when i have sex... My boyfriend don't think so, but I just can't have it.. So....
I don't know if it will be better at all....

[applecrumble]

An ex of mine was like his body conscious etc... She found leaving her top + bra on + lights off under cover was the only way that she would be comfortable maybe you could try that?